returning from the abyss

strange how i finish school and drop blogging. i actually believe this really happened due to cv and i's no cable/internet zone. we made this choice to encourage more time together and its been good. so good that we aren't contemplating returning to the world wide web at home anytime soon. before you think we've become cultic purists, know that cv does have the iphone now--which means we can get some modified internet anytime anywhere (practically) but blogging via iphone is painful at best.

so life out of school is good. i don't miss tests, papers, studying or classes. i am still learning at a voracious pace at my work. for months work was feeling manageable, now it feels a bit overwhelming again--all part of the path from novice to expert i hear.

cv and i went snowshoeing/cross country skiing yesterday. it was lovely, peaceful and eventually exhausting. i wore these baby blue plastic trays on the bottom of my feet and trudged with a broader than usual gait. cv wore 1980's cross country skiis that kept sticking to the snow and causing him to kerplunk over. which led to my "are you okay?" and his "*?!+&!". in the end, cv, rufus and i were wet and so tired, but in the good way. we indulged in pizza at the local government camp pub and meandered home through traffic.

i got a whole new bushel of pictures of my neice and nephew this week. they are too adorable for words. please DO NOT point out that i am biased, this is a given. nonetheless i think they are quite likeable from an objective point of view. jet is wonderfully plump and full of laughter. kai is curious and full of spunk. she is exploring her artist, drummer side. here are some new pictures for your "viewing pleasure."

parenting

well i had the immense pleasure the last ten days of spending time with my brother, his wife, and two kids. and i have to tell you--kids are delightful and tiring. nothing more "baby brain" producing than the running around, playdohing, baby pool splashing, and dora the exploring. i greatly admire my brother and his wife for what a loving, patient job they do.

cv and i can hardly wait to be parents. however, i was humbled this week at the level of energy and sacrifice it requires. i so, so miss the sweet smell of kai and jet's heads, though.

visitors

cv and i rarely have "drop by" visitors and yesterday we had three friends, our realtor, and two neighbor kids drop by all at the same time. it was a veritable frenzy of intentionaly community planning, sharing of toys, and general smiling. justin, brooke, and lindsay discussed the details of their home purchase for an intentional community in north portland. toni printed out the offer. mirabel and blatis played with a cup and ball toy and investigated our russian nesting doll that my dad got for me in the ukraine.

i liked it. i tend to be rather private with my home space. which is weird, as i really enjoy the company generally.
maybe this new stint of lack of screens will open my heart a bit more.

kill the screens

well, cv and i are taking the plunge. we are cancelling our comcast cable and internet access for at least the next three months. this will be a new adventure to determine what to do with the previously multiple filled hours of screen time. of course, we can still surf the internet at the local coffee shop, rent a movie, or whatev, but at least the mindlessness will likely dissapate. we are hoping it will be good for our backsides, relationships, and community. we'll keep you posted on how it goes.
i hear from a friend, who is single and lives alone, that it can be remarkably quiet.


"American children and adolescents spend 22 to 28 hours per week viewing television, more than any other activity except sleeping. By the age of 70 they will have spent 7 to 10 years of their lives watching TV."
-- The Kaiser Family Foundation

neighbor ninos

you really gotta love their little smiles, requests for popsicles, and wriggling under the fence. :-)

ants

cv and i awoke this morning to ants in our box of raisin bran. ants in our cookbooks. ants in our spices. ants on the countertop. ants behind the vent fan. they were everywhere.

at least they motivated us to organize and clean behind the oven.

darn those little ants.

saint cupcake

mmm . . . . a new ideal dessert to crave - - - the fat elvis

new babies are sweet

it's a great time at vibrant. its june and all the babies are coming out. we have four new babies this year--sydney, ariella, colin & aiden. the most fun for me is seeing the new dads, who are liking this a lot more than I would have expected.

congratulations to the butlers, walters, centonis, and kendalls. good work!

God in the Mundane

So for the last several weeks we have been talking about experiencing God in the mundane. There are two events that happened in the last month that I wanted to share.

One happened Tuesday night when CV and I were making our weekly stop to buy groceries for C-Group. For some reason most of the electricity was out at the local Safeway, but people and cashiers kept at it anyway, so we joined in. While in line I noticed behind us that the young woman had a baked decorated cake that was sort of squished. She had some frosting on her hands that she was trying to avoid getting elsewhere. She was paying for this cake after she had damaged it. The more I thought about it, the more I realized what an enormous act of integrity that was. I know I would be so likely to just set it aside and pick up a new cake. Especially since the store was dark and really "who would know?" But no, she was paying for and keeping that damaged cake. I thought, now that's the type of person we should be inviting to Vibrant.

Later that same week, CV, my mom, and I went to VooDoo Donuts on our bicycles in the rain. I really am beginning to think VooDoo is a rather spiritual place, as before when I was there we had a cool experience with a homeless woman, Rita, who was learning to be more grateful. This time we were outside sipping our coffee when CV and I watched a large blond homeless man take the top off a public wastebasket. He was searching for food and found a whole bag of bagels. He twisted off the tie, took one bagel, and then closed it again. He placed the rest back in the can, put the top on the can, and get this, he says out loud to the can "thank you." Here is a man who has little to nothing, and yet he only takes what he needs, and is grateful for the gift. I was floored.

Having character when no one is watching is a really tough thing for me. I find myself cutting corners when no one is looking, or at least I think no one is. Perhaps if my faith were stronger I would be constantly aware of the Lord's presence.

In Operating Instructions by Anne Lamott she talks about temptation. How she really wants to sin and yet hears the words of her therapist "Do you want the hit or do you want serenity?" In candid Anne form she admit---"right now I just want the hit."

real life

so i am fumbling through my first day at home without any school, work, or visitors. i was in the midst of trying to choose between making fattening blueberry muffins and eating them all, then sleeping off a food coma, or fastidiously cleaning the entire house as i now notice how filthy it is without all my usual distractions. so, i as contemplated this dilemma, i did so in the room where all good contempletives go. prior to attending to my affairs, i closed the open window and SMASH! knocked a glass cotton swab container to the floor. a sudden answer to my quandry.

as you may know, i've had an amazing few weeks with lots of attention from friends and family for my graduation and birthday. while i feel proud of this accomplishment, i feel a bit strange about all the attention. it feels like maybe everyone got my birthdate day wrong and continue celebrating although i've informed them "it really isn't my birthday." i've gotten dozens of sweet cards, stacks of cash, and lovely monogrammed wine glasses. i spent yet another day shopping yesterday and realized, maybe its not that i've hate shopping so much, maybe i just hate shopping when i don't feel like i can afford it. ;-)

monday i'll be back to work at the hospital as an RN, while awaiting my NP license from the Board of Nursing. the rumor is i will be hired soon as a contract NP to work at first while they iron out employment details. this is exciting and a bit nerve wracking. i know contract negotiations will involve negotiations. it can be hard to sell oneself. i want to ask for plenty without sounding too audacious. my faculty preceptor quoted $90/hr. "whatever they pay you, they are getting a deal!" she says. two peers alternately said $65 and $75 per hour was what they are getting with no benefits. i look at the website and the consult liasion job is $38-52 plus all the benefits. argh!

my nephew is too precious by the way. we just returned from visiting Jet. he weighs a ton at only 1 1/2 months and slept twice through the night while we were there. he is obviously very advanced. he is a snuggle bug and is at the point in development where he crosses his eyes and gives you those drunk looking half smiles which may just be from gas. Kai, my nearly 2 neice, was precious but cranky, which we discovered was due to a case of strep throat. we became convinced of her illness finally after she vomited in her own hair.

while in texas i read two baby books---one by the baby whisperer and one by Anne Lamott. cv and i are getting stoked about having our own little one and cv announced loudly on the plane on the way home "we need to make a baby!" "uh, why don't you say that a little louder, hon?" i replied.

the hartline-braun wedding was as exhausting and opulent as you might imagine. there were thousands of flowers, miles of white satin, fancy cardstock tied with black ribbon, and about 300 guests. i enjoyed my first strapless dress and updo since high school. i also had my makeup done professionally for the first time. nikki, my sister-in-law, was an incredibly gorgeous bride, john, her groom, was enamored of her and said lots of funny, kind things during his reception speech. they will move soon to little rock.

well, i guess i better get back to either deep cleaning or food coma . . . .